Tribe. It’s one of those words you hear quite a lot these days, and as a mum more than ever. Before I had Emma, it’s safe to say I felt that I hadn’t found mine. Rather, I had personal relationships with a few very close friends, but never that group of girlfriends as a support network. No Sex and the City midnight banana splits at a local coffeehouse here! I’m not saying that as a sob story, because it’s not, and almost preferred the one-to-one relationships with friends, instead of the big group dynamic. Then I entered mummyhood, moved to a new city and things changed. Suddenly, at 34 weeks pregnant, I needed that support and started to feel very daunted about not knowing other mums in the area. I was scared about feeling isolated and alone. I always put that down to being new to the area, but as one of my Brightonian mummy friends pointed out, even if you have lots of friends in the city, they’re all at work when you need a bit of company during the day!
In my day-to-day life, I stressed about not finding like-minded Mums to hang out with when Emma was younger. I remember wondering if it was me…was I socially a bit awkward? Or maybe I wasn’t empathetic or funny enough? I really shouldn’t have worried as it all worked itself out. In the end I met just a few Mums who are among the loveliest girls I have ever met.
In my blog life, I started writing this blog and at first felt so nervous about everything I wrote. I feel really lucky to have found a tribe of bloggers, thanks to the wonderful Katie a.k.a Mummy in a Tutu. In my first month of blogging, I replied to her blog support thread and summoned a bit of courage to tell the others I was having a crisis of confidence. What I got in return was so much support and love for my blog. Katie’s Facebook group is amazing, with threads running each day, such as Blog Support, Klout, Instagram hashtags and Giveaways. The one that really touched me though was a thread where you say something positive about one member of the group. I was completely taken back by how thoughtful that is, and those positive comments completely made my day.
It’s only in the past 6 weeks that I feel like I’ve finally found my feet with blogging. At first I felt that maybe writing just wasn’t for me, if I’m really honest, but I suppose there’s just no science to it as to how long it takes to gain a bit of confidence with it. Time was one thing and I am always a bit impatient at the best of times…then there’s the tribal factor. I’ve read various blogs about finding your tribe and although I hadn’t thought about it when I first started my blog, it makes total sense. A small group of like-minded bloggers to support and champion you, for which you do the same of course. And it’s thanks to these lovely ladies that I feel pretty proud of my little blog.
So if you’re reading this thinking “this is me! I haven’t found my tribe either” please don’t worry like I did. It does take time and that all important patience. Plus sleep deprivation turns some of us (me) into a shadow of our former selves and it will all work out in the end. Above all, never doubt yourself, as you’re doing great.