I Choose Hope

On Saturday night I went to bed and although I was tired, my eyes were wide open. Because moments before, I had heard about the London Bridge Terrorist Attacks. I was horrified. That same bridge where I’ve caught the train to Brighton numerous times, where I used to work for a while. Tower Bridge is one of my favourite places in London and Borough Market is where my other half used to take me for dinner to our favourite Turkish restaurant.  I know this is not about me, but I can’t help but make that connection. I can’t help but admit to myself that this feels so very real.

On March 22nd 2017, when there was a terrorist attack in Westminster, I was overwhelmed by feelings of protectiveness and anger towards the attack on this city, London, which has been part of my life always. As I was growing up, it was where we’d be taken on a family day out to the theatre. In my twenties, it was my home. I would not think anything of going in and out of Central London and so often had to do so for work. London is a part of me and an attack on this city makes me feel numb, vulnerable and at a complete loss. It’s easy to say ‘carry on as normal’ – we all know that in practice it’s a very different matter.

Then there’s Emma. How will I explain to her why these atrocities happen? All day we teach her to be kind, to be gentle with others and that people are inherently good. But this – this I can’t explain. I’m glad she’s too young to know what is happening around us, that to me the world doesn’t quite make sense anymore. I’m not ready for it yet – I’m not ready to find the right way to tell her that there are some bad people in the world, who want to hurt others senselessly. On Sunday morning, as we munched on dry Cheerios and watched Octonauts – I held her tight and she looked at me all confused as to why Mummy was feeling slightly odd, why Mummy couldn’t carry on as normal.

I choose hope and positivity. I choose to see the good and the kindness to get through this. We have to, don’t we? I have to believe that there is more good in this world than bad. And I truly do. I live in hope that the world will be better some day, that when Emma grows up it will be different. But really, I’m overcome with worry that these recent attacks on the country we live in is a sign of things to come. Some things will always be out of our control and that worries me so very much.

Above all, I hope that love will rise about anything else. I hope that in years to come, I’ll wonder why I worried so much about our future. But the reality is, I’m not so sure.

My love and thoughts go out to all affected by the London Bridge and Borough Market terrorist attacks 

BritMums

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58 Comments

  1. June 6, 2017 / 6:09 am

    I love this post! We all need love and positivity, this violence is becoming just too much! #DreamTeam

  2. June 6, 2017 / 6:12 am

    what happened is truly devastating, my prayers go out to everyone in the UK. we were trying to wrap our heads around what happened in Manchester only to have this happen. I too choose hope and worry about what the future might look like for our children. #dreamteam

  3. June 6, 2017 / 6:24 am

    Faith, hope, love…The greatest of these is love.

  4. June 6, 2017 / 7:52 am

    It’s so awful that people can come to the conclusion this is the only way for them. I can’t and never will understand it. It is important to remember this is the minority and most people are good and would never do anything like this.

  5. June 6, 2017 / 7:56 am

    I’m still feeling rather shell-shocked by it all, it’s a scary world right now. You just have to concentrate on the hope, the light in the darkness, to get through. #DreamTeam

  6. June 6, 2017 / 7:56 am

    Faith and hope are pretty good for starters. I feel like just keeping all of my loved ones near me. It’s a sad state of affairs at the moment.
    Mainy
    #dreamteam

  7. June 6, 2017 / 8:13 am

    It really is worrying with everything that’s going on at the moment. I can imagine that it is a lot worse for you being so near to the Capital. I just hope that we can gain some control back over these terrible people as our children shouldn’t have to grow up worrying about this kind of thing. #DreamTeam

  8. June 6, 2017 / 8:35 am

    The fear is suffocating. I’m trying so so hard to let hope prevail because anything else is just too terrifying at the moment xx #DreamTeam

  9. June 6, 2017 / 8:57 am

    I have felt so sad over the last few weeks about all of these recent events. I have squeezed Amelia so tight recently she must wonder what is going on! It does scare me to think of the world we live in but i have to remind myself of the good people and that these awful people are the minority. I really hope i can educate her to realise that good out numbers the bad and so does love. #dreamteam

  10. June 6, 2017 / 9:12 am

    Yes its been a reflective few weeks really and I have been up and down about the whole thing feeling dispair and fear but then hope and encouragement. I feel reassured that there are a lot more good people in the world then there are bad and the stories of heroism, bravery and kindness is what I have tried to focus on. xx #DreamTeam

  11. June 6, 2017 / 9:13 am

    Like you, I’m trying to focus on hope and love, but there is no denying these are dark days and the world feels like a terrifying place for our young ones to be growing up in… #DreamTeam

  12. June 6, 2017 / 9:44 am

    i’ve just read another Dream Team post about looking for the helpers – there IS always more good than bad. A warming thought, but like you – I feel really knocked by this attack. Really don’t know if things will ever improve – we just need to stay positive xx #DreamTeam

  13. June 6, 2017 / 10:11 am

    My love and thoughts go to all of you in London. You’re right, it’s hard to explain these things ha to our kids without starting the whole hatred ball rolling. Beautiful post.
    #dreamteam

  14. June 6, 2017 / 10:29 am

    What happened is very sad and scary. But love will always win over hate. Good luck. #dreamteam

  15. June 6, 2017 / 10:59 am

    It is extremely awful that again this has happened. Our country will move on with strength and hope. 🙂 x #dreamteam

  16. June 6, 2017 / 12:22 pm

    Hope and Love are the key to moving forward. It’s been a tough few weeks but everyone is showing so much strength and courage which is so nice to see.

  17. June 6, 2017 / 1:14 pm

    I feel the same. I’ve spent so much time in that area. It makes it feel closer somehow. And again how do you explain to a child that you can’t protect them from everything. Like you I’m hoping that this will pass and that we won’t have to worry about such barbaric things happening on a normal night out. #DreamTeam

  18. lisalambert38 - Mumdadplus4.co.uk
    June 6, 2017 / 1:17 pm

    I couldn’t believe the news myself after arriving home after a night out in Manchester, I was devastated at the event in Manchester on the 22nd May I knew people effected by it and its been such a tragic and emotional time for close family and friends. Its just horrible what these people are doing and it makes no sense 🙁 #DreamTeam

  19. June 6, 2017 / 2:06 pm

    I’ve seen Fred Rogers quote alot in the last few weeks and it’s really helped me: “When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, ‘Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping. To this day, especially in times of disaster, I remember my mother’s words, and I am always comforted by realizing that there are still so many helpers — so many caring people in this world.”

    We’re out in London rarely at night, but passed though LB underground as they were closing it. When we lived in South London, I walked along that bridge every day to the station and went drinking around Borough. Just so sad …

  20. Lucy At Home
    June 6, 2017 / 2:15 pm

    It seems unbelievable that we could have 3 terror attacks in such a short space of time. It is frightening and distressing and evil and sad. Like you, I’m glad that my children are still too young to know about it, but I worry for the world that they are going to be growing up in… #dreamteam

  21. June 6, 2017 / 2:17 pm

    It really is a hot mess and only getting worse I fear. I dont even know where to begin. #dreamteam

  22. June 6, 2017 / 2:33 pm

    I sat and watched the concert for Manchester and cried and cried. Never before have we all been so affected by recent events. I am truly horrified by the actions of these crazy individuals towards the very fabric of GB, liberty. I hope that the families will get all the support that they need and that we never forget the victims. I have been thinking of those living and working in large cities recently and hope that they know that everyone in the UK will support them. But I also want us, as a nation to carry on doing the things we love like going to concerts. Otherwise those men have won. Lovely post and very moving. You are not alone in feeling like this lovely. #dreamteam

  23. June 6, 2017 / 3:21 pm

    Just like you, I am so grateful that my two are still too young to really understand anything of what is happening. I don’t want them to know and to feel afraid. Not yet. For now I just want to keep them safe and let them believe that there is no senseless evil in the world. One day I know that I will have to, but when I do I hope to share with them the fact that each of these atrocities carried out by such a minority, are always followed by a tidal wave of love by the thousands of people who are good and make the world a better place. That is my hope too. #DreamTeam xx

  24. June 6, 2017 / 3:44 pm

    Such an awful thing to happen. There are no words. But love will always win.

    #DreamTeam

  25. June 6, 2017 / 6:54 pm

    I choose hope too but what’s happened over the last three months has given us all pause for thought. Lovely post. xx #dreamteam

  26. June 6, 2017 / 8:06 pm

    This week I honestly could have chosen locking the doors and never going out again, but seeing the strength and courage of those youngsters get back to a music concert after what they experienced did make me realise life has to go on. It’s just unimaginable what those people went through, but as you say, in a location so familiar to all of us, its frighteningly imaginable too…
    #Dreamteam

  27. June 6, 2017 / 8:39 pm

    I am completely with you on this. I woke up to the news on Sunday morning whilst Little H and I were staying away with a friend. I just wanted to jump straight in the car there and then to get the long drive home done with – to be in our house with my husband/her dad. I work in London and went back in today for the first time since the weekend. It felt the same yet different. I couldn’t help but cast my eyes over everyone around me all the more because however hard you try, a bit of fear is there. And for me the fear is if I weren’t to be there for Little H. But life has to go on. People have to work, to live. Like you, I choose to believe that the majority of people are good – I really feel that’s true. But I also fear that we have more turbulent times to come… I hope I’m wrong. #DreamTeam

  28. June 6, 2017 / 9:17 pm

    Like you I am so glad that my children are too young to even register these atrocities. But what happens when that day comes, when they begin to ask and be affected by these things? I don’t have the answers right now, and I’m glad I don’t have to. I agree, I believe that we cannot fight hate with hate. All we can do for our children is to continue to teach them love, compassion, and to always try to do what is right. #DreamTeam

  29. June 6, 2017 / 9:32 pm

    Sunday mornings are always blog time for me. The husband takes Little Man grocery shopping and swimming and it gives me a few hours to get things done. But this last week I couldn’t. I tried to sit and write what I had planned, but the words just weren’t coming. I ended up just staring at the TV screen feeling more and more anxious. These attacks seem to be getting more and more frequent and I just don’t know how it’s going to end. It’s frightening. #DreamTeam

  30. June 6, 2017 / 9:48 pm

    I think most people will talk about it and feel the same as you do. Most will have a connection there, my own family member (a newlywed) was in the city when it happened. Thankfully they are all okay though. It is sad knowing our children are growing up in such a harsh environment. #DreamTeam

  31. June 6, 2017 / 10:14 pm

    I was glued to the tv on saturday night as soon as I saw it happen. My partner used to have lunch every Friday in Borough Market when he was working just down the road. Its one of the places we usually visit when we go to London. Seeing the familiar places on the news was shocking. I hope the world gets less scary as our children grow up but i’m not sure it will. x #dreamteam

  32. June 6, 2017 / 10:15 pm

    Its all so upsetting. I feel the same. Lets hope for love and positivity. #DreamTeam

  33. June 7, 2017 / 12:08 am

    After each of the attacks I have lay in bed awake for most of the night. It is all so terrifying and I worry what world I children will grow up in. Lets hope we are near to the end of all this for our childrens sake.

  34. caitcance
    June 7, 2017 / 1:51 am

    It’s so hard for us to wrap our heads around tragedies like this and try to make sense of them. I felt the same as you when the Sandy Hook school shooting happened. I live in Connecticut less than an hour from there and my own children were at their school while I was watching news coverage of the poor little children who were killed and I couldn’t get it out of my mind for days.

  35. June 7, 2017 / 9:23 am

    We’re all feeling the same – I just want to wrap my kids up in bubble wrap and take them away to a remote island, as I wrote about too, but then what kind of life would that be, as tempting as it is at the moment? My 10 year old is very aware of the last 2 terrorist attacks and everyday I’m fielding questions about why people could do this, have the police caught them, are they still out there? It’s so hard to be 100% reassuring when inside, I don’t know the answers to any of these questions myself. Let’s hope the powers that be can put a stop to this as soon as possible. Too many innocent lives lost tragically, and my heart goes out to their families. #DreamTeam

  36. June 7, 2017 / 11:11 am

    I was horrified when this happened yet again! What world are we bringing up our kids in? I’m still hopeful that love will win in the end, but in the meantime, we just have to continue educating ourselves and those around us that violence is never the answer to anything! #DreamTeam

  37. Musings of a tired mummy...zzz...
    June 7, 2017 / 12:12 pm

    Dreadful events, horrific to imagine. I tell my children and reassure them. I make sure they learn about love and respect, tolerance and acceptance. Good will prevail. #dreamteam

  38. June 7, 2017 / 1:10 pm

    It’s a cruel world, that’s for sure. But there’s so much beauty and kindness. I’m trying to raise my kids to be light in the darkness – but I often fear for their futures. My daughter noticed me crying while watching the OneLove concert and I couldn’t explain why! #dreamteam

  39. June 7, 2017 / 6:35 pm

    What happened on Saturday was horrific and my thoughts go out to all of those affected. hope and positivity is a great way to start into the future #bestandworst

  40. June 7, 2017 / 6:36 pm

    So sorry not with it meant to put #dreamteam oops

  41. June 7, 2017 / 7:53 pm

    Living in London, I know exactly where you are coming from. But we must carry on. It’s tremendously sad for those affected by this, as with Manchester and any atrocity for that matter. I cuddled my two too. Pulling them closer at times like this is such a natural response to the horror. Great post.
    #DreamTeam

  42. June 7, 2017 / 9:09 pm

    #dreamteam i agree, growing up in London it feels so close to home. However, all terror, all war and all political manipulation is wrong. kindness and love always win because you’ve already mentioned the hope you have for the future.

  43. June 7, 2017 / 9:27 pm

    We live in Norfolk, however my partner works in London 2 days a week, I hate him going I worry the entire time he is there. I used to love visiting, I worked there too many years ago. But not now, I’m supposed to be coming up in a few months for the weekend but I’m dreading it if I’m honest. A friend of a friend was on Westminster bridge when the car ran into people there. Her boyfriend pushed her out of the way effectively saving her life, she now is to frightened to go out seeming to be suffering from PTSD.
    I wonder why there is so much hate in this world?
    #dreamteam

  44. June 7, 2017 / 10:45 pm

    Absolutely agree with this – I really do hope there is something better round the corner and not more hate. For the sake of our children #dreamteam

  45. talkingmums1
    June 8, 2017 / 11:51 am

    Its so sad and it is so hard to know what to say to our children. I too worry about their future and what it holds. We can only hope that the future brings light x
    #DreamTeam

  46. June 8, 2017 / 12:43 pm

    I think we all have to chose hope, it’s the on,y way we can move forward x
    #DreamTeam

  47. June 8, 2017 / 2:32 pm

    I live in Manchester and the bombing really did hit me right in the heart. I watched the news and I cried, I am still heartbroken now. We all need to keep love in our hearts and faith that we can all move forward from these attacks. I think it really hits home when it is in your hometown, it makes it feel much more personal 🙁 #dreamteam

  48. June 8, 2017 / 6:19 pm

    I love this Bridget, and I really wish that I could feel the same way. The truth is I don’t (I have a blog post drafted about it actually), I feel terrified, and pessimistic and a feeling of dread. I’m not sure how it will ever get better, although we have to believe that it will….#dreamteam

  49. Mom Of Two Little Girls
    June 10, 2017 / 7:25 pm

    It is absolutely terrifying. I was working near Carnaby Street when the 7/07 bombings happened all those years ago. My sister still works in central London and every time I turn on the news I’m terrified by the memory of that day and the news of the recent attacks that something is going to happen to her. I know that’s what they want. I know that’s what they crave. But the goal posts have shifted from war arsenal and bombs to kitchen knives and trucks. The use of such basic, rudimentary objects as weapons is terrifying. Lets just hug them closer.
    #dreamteam

  50. June 10, 2017 / 11:41 pm

    It’s so hard to get your head around. Absolutely horrific and so frightening. What a world! I wish I had your positivity. So hard to believe that it’s going to change any time soon. #Dreamteam

  51. June 11, 2017 / 8:52 pm

    The terrorism that’s happening more frequently in our country is terrifying, it was one thing when abroad, but quite another in places we’ve been to. We had been in London on the day of the London Bridge incident, luckily we were home by the time if happened. But it makes me sad for our children as they have a potential future of fear which is not what I envisaged for the next generation.
    The one love concert summed it up brilliantly in letting people know that life goes on, love conquers all and we will fight the good fight! #dreamteam

  52. June 11, 2017 / 10:17 pm

    Beautiful and positive post. I went to Borough Market last night and paid my respects #dreamteam

  53. June 12, 2017 / 6:31 am

    Oh to be little again and in a bubble of bliss. #DreamTeam

  54. June 12, 2017 / 10:09 pm

    Ah emotional reading my love. You are saying what so many of us feel #dreamteam

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