A few weeks ago, my lovely friend Clare who writes over at The Pramshed tagged me in a ‘10 Ways I’m #RockingMotherhood’ post. The idea came about by another friend of mine, Pat from White Camellias who wrote a fantastic post about how she rocks at being a mother. I thought it was such a lovely thing to write about, to think about the positive sides to parenting, to focus on what we’re getting right instead of beating ourself (myself) up that my daughter much prefers chicken dippers to cucumber and will devour crisps but won’t touch pasta.
The truth is that some days I find it hard to find the positives. Emma is almost two years old now and seems to be forever changing, which means I am supposed to be changing with her. One day she might wake up and be obsessed with sweetcorn (true story) but I had no idea. And another day, she might decide that she only needs one nap in the day now (another true story), but the thing is that no-one sent me the memo. But despite all this, here’s why I think I’m rocking motherhood…
I let Emma do things in her own time. I worry about the milestones like any mum, but I try and put that aside so she can develop in her own time. Emma never does things in line with her other buddies, I’ve come to realise. At first I would genuinely feel really worried about it, like she wasn’t speaking much because maybe I don’t talk to her enough. Or maybe she’s not toddling yet because we don’t have a garden. But it was none of these things at all, she just takes things at her own pace.
We watch TV, a lot. I watch a lot of Mr Tumble, Bing and Peppa Pig on a daily basis because it makes Emma smile. I love seeing her laugh at the characters in the shows she loves and recognising a squirrel or a bird. She’s now started saying quite a few words when she watches, which is lovely to see.
I drink imaginary cuppateas countless times a day. As with a lot of toddlers, Emma makes an excellent cup of imaginary tea. So when she takes me over to the sofa and says “sit!” I do as she says and we drink tea and make yummy noises. We’ve even taught her how to clink and say cheers which I believe is a life skill.
I pretend to know what she is trying to tell me. The words are slowly coming but there are so many words that I don’t have a clue what they are. But sometimes I see the determined look on her face and pretend to understand and we have lovely pretend chit chats.
Sometimes I guess the word correctly. These moments make me super proud, when I somehow decipher that she wanted a glass of water. I have to confess it doesn’t happen that often, but when it does…an elated cheer from both Emma and me follows. Win!
I run home as soon as work is finished to be with Emma. I returned back to work in September, which was difficult at first to be apart from my little girl. But now I see it is a good thing for both of us, and as soon as it’s 6pm, I run for the train to be with Emma for bedtime.
I teach Emma to be kind and thoughtful. We’ve just entered the terrible two’s (I think) and unfortunately Emma gets full of rage sometimes if she doesn’t get her own way. We’ve had hitting and pushing but I teach her to be kind, gentle and thoughtful. Sometimes it feels a bit fruitless, but I really want our kids to be polite and kind people.
I tell her how much I love her as many times as I can each day. For such a long time now, Emma has been an independent soul – she doesn’t want me to hold her. But I do anyway and tell her I love her multiple times a day. I also love checking on her in the night and telling her I love her while she is dreaming.
I am patient and calm, as much as I can! I try to stay patient, calm and positive no matter how challenging that is throughout the day. Sometimes I don’t, and feel terrible for losing that patience but I think it can only be a good thing to set this example for her.
I make our weekends count. One of the lovely things about being back at work is how precious the weekends feel now. I sort of took our time together for granted when I was on maternity leave but now I make them count and organise fun things to do together.
So there’s my reasons why I’m rocking motherhood, turns out it wasn’t so hard after all! I’m now tagging the following bloggers to take part…
Annette at 3 Little Buttons
Dawn at Rhyming with Wine
Mackenzie at Reflections of Me